The other night at a chaplains meeting we were discussing the importance of clear communication when talking to people who had experienced a death of a family member. Specifically it had been the practice of our group to mail out cards on the first anniversary of a family death. There is no need to explain how this practice makes sense, however, it appears that at least one chaplain had frequently mailed out sympathy cards without writing anything in the cards to explain why the recipients were getting them. As you can imagine, this practice has caused a few people some level of distress.
"What does this chaplain know that I don’t?"
"I thought Uncle Joes surgery was a simple out patient procedure."
"I wonder if they mailed this to the wrong Obadiah Maiefski?"
The conversation completely fell apart when my wife shared that she too had received a sympathy card about a week after the one year anniversary of her father’s death. She explained that at first she assumed it was a mistake and then looked through the church directory to see if there was someone with a similar name. When that search didn’t provide any clue, she then checked the post mark date to see if it had been lost in the mail for a year!
The lesson to be shared with everyone is no matter what you do, it should be a goal to Make No New Victims!
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